Over the last couple of months I have noticed that actions speak louder words ever will. I have learned to start using that motto in my day-to-day life. I am writing this to say your actions will speak for you. It will show everyone what you refuse to speak of. Trying to cover up your actions with speaking shows that you have something to hide and that you are afraid to share. If you say you are able to survive alone, but yet you cling to something that is poisonous because you are terrified of being alone; then you are not ready to be alone. You say that you have respect for yourself, but accept the constant lies from someone that make you question their actions, yet you are the one begging them not leave. The pain, shaming, and constant lack of support keeps you around for the long haul, what good comes from those actions? But yet you take their word and they say that it will get better, but never does. You hold on to the one good time, that one time is the one thing that you can show everyone. It is the one thing that helps you validate their negative actions for your happiness. Then maybe my actions are chivalrous, maybe you do not know what happiness is. This whole time, you do not know what actions are the real actions. You have to love yourself before you are able to love someone else. You cannot do that if you cannot trust their actions or their words.
But who am I, just someone out here trying to love myself.